Newsletter
Howdy Folks
It's ole Jim again. I am typing this one-handed and scratching
with the other. You see, last Sunday Shirl and I went to the annual
St. Louis Jazz Club picnic. It's usually a pleasant affair. You pack
a picnic dinner and then spend the afternoon listening to a number
of jazz groups, while you sip beer and eat fried chicken.
Well, this year the Club tried a new venue, some place called
Farmer's Grove. About half way through the afternoon, Shirl and I
were spending more time scratching than we were
applauding--mosquitoes we thought. When we came home that night and
took showers, I discovered the horrible truth, not
mosquitoes...CHIGGERS! For those of you unfamiliar with this beast
consider this comparison: take the itchiest mosquito bite you ever
had, square that, then multiple by ten. That's what a chigger bite
feels like and they last for days and days. Shirl's rump is covered
with them and I have them in...well... a delicate portion of my
anatomy. We sit around here clawing at ourselves and it looks like
the chimp cage at the zoo.
Earlier this summer, Shirl attended another "zoo" of sorts. She
went the Romance Writers of America conference in Denver. I guess
maybe a good ten thousand or so people attend that annual
conference, and it is virtually impossible to hook up with friends,
at least it was this year. The redhead did get to meet with some of
her old buddies. Among the ones I remember her mentioning were
Virginia Henley, Pat Potter, Christina Skye (who has read some of my
work on obscene slang and possesses the intelligence to appreciate
it), and Kat and Larry Martin. Shirl said that Larry was looking
great. If that's so, then he's fallen off the "wagon" and is
drinking embalming fluid again. Larry, stay away from mortuaries!
The RWA general meeting, apparently, was a battle royal that went
on for hours. Some of the troops were apparently furious with the
way the "generals" were running the army. The currant president of
RWA is a man, and he barely escaped castration, according to Shirl.
Serves the guy right, I say. Any male that would want to be head of
an organization that is composed of aggressive females would have
volunteered to ride point guard for Custer. Clean the gene pool!
But Shirl was saved from the unpleasantness, when I flew in and
she and I then hooked up with our friends Bob and Pam Voit for a few
days of R&R. Some of you may remember that the Voits are the
ones with the homicidal horses that keep trying to murder me (the
horses, not the Voits...I think). Anyway, Bob got rid of my old
friend Albert, "the wonder horse," when he discovered the arms cache
hidden in his stall. He got another young horse, a real beauty.
Well, thank god, my back went out on me a couple of days before I
flew into Denver and my chiropractor gave me a note excusing me from
any equestrian duties. I didn't have to go riding up the mountain
with Bob and Shirl.
Shirl said the ride was wonderful until they started back. She
was on Sancho, the beautiful black guy in the photo. Bob was on the
new young horse--for a while. Suddenly, it was show time. She said
that new horse, with Bob aboard, gave a great impression of RODEO!
That sucker started bucking, twisting, spinning, lunging. She and
Sancho just froze. Anyway, Bob had to bail; but fortunately, he
landed on some soft soil and pine needles and wasn't hurt too bad.
Now, guess which horse I would have been riding had my back not been
acting up? Next time I go up there, what do you want to bet that I
won't have a note from the allergist attesting to the fact that I
suffer from horsetitus, a fatal allergy triggered by coming within
20 feet of a horse. My momma done raised no fools.
Ah yes, Shirl is working on "The American Lords" trilogy for
Leisure. The first, The Yankee Earl, has already been
written; but exactly when the series will start to come out has not
been determined yet. Will keep you posted.
Best,
Don't forget to visit
http://www.dorchesterpub.com.
Jim